he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was about to share my drunken story from the weekend, but two friends getting married and one finding out she's pregnant makes Saturday in jail look a little suspect.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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