its not stalking. its research.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Randomize
