Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
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