Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
