too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Randomize
