i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
