I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
I party with great urgency now.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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