i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize