So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
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