I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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