U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Official reason: I couldn't get time off. The real reason: last Xmas nearly ended in alcohol poisoning to prevent me from screaming like a velociraptor
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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