Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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