I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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