Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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