i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
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If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
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Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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