i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize