kristin has been a bad kristin
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
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