so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
