i was rollin on her like bob the builder
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
God, you're like boner-b-gone
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
