I think i sorta joined a cult last night
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
