He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Randomize
