I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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