How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
