Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
they're like a gay fantastic four
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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