It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
