i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
