I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
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