i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
send nudes
from the living room?
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