Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
