It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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