Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
...I can smell the alcohol on your breath through that text
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
