I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I may wear a condom to jerk-off tomorrow knowing that my hand has touched surfaces in this bar.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
dude. I can hear the air.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
