I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
