I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
