what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize