Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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