I need help removing her.
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Randomize
