Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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