i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
Randomize
