i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize
