when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Randomize
