The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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