Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
