I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize