this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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