why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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