Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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