So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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