Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Just woke up next to a girl with 30 hot dogs in my bed. Vodka you win again.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
Randomize
