I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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